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All I ask is that you treat me no differently than you would the Queen. |
Life is like a box of chocolates. It's full of nuts. |
On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key. |
Funny jokes, short funny stories, aphorisms, anecdotes, real funny stories, funny jokes, short funny stories. |







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all aphorisms
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience. (C) Bill Watterson 03/14/2008
Life happens too fast for you ever to think about it. If you could just persuade people of this, but they insist on amassing information. (C) Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. 03/14/2008
Everyone is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes. (C) Edgard Varese 03/14/2008
Wit is the only wall between us and the dark. (C) Mark Van Doren 03/14/2008
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. (C) Mark Twain 03/14/2008
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language. (C) Mark Twain 03/14/2008
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said, "I don't know." (C) Mark Twain 03/14/2008
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. (C) Mark Twain 03/14/2008
I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it. (C) Harry S Truman 03/14/2008
Clear writers assume, with a pessimism born of experience, that whatever isn't plainly stated the reader will invariably misconstrue. (C) John R. Trimble 03/14/2008
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